Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize