Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
