Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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