There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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