Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
