He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
