there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
