My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
