whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize