I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
