it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Randomize
