how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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