Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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