Come see our sink grown plant.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
