clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
