I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
