There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I need to stop coming to work sober
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
