Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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