My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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