I could have mohawked her pubes.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Randomize
