It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
