Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
