I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
