I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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