People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
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