whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
