My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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