He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
