We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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