last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
