Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
The best revenge is premature balding
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
