i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
