Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
