It's Friday. Sex?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
