i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
