My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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