So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
