hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Randomize
