mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
