The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
