i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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