why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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