I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
