If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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