Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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