happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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