well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
