We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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