5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
