I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
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